30 September, 2007

I'm gonna take pictures and write a book..

Yeah I know it's been a while..
Last time I wrote anything I was still in Colorado hangin with the world's coolest 2 year old!!
that was almost 4 weeks ago... I miss that little guy... And his dad and mom... My mom and my dad too for that matter... Heck, but that's okay... It's good to miss where you come from, I think, It makes you never forget that you are loved... Now that makes me smile..
I am sittting here thinking about what comes next. Trying to think through the noise of the unoffical block party that takes place every saturday night on the corner across the street from me tends to be a little difficult... But sometimes they play some decent music... No Gypsy Music, but hey we are not all perfect...
Today was my official last day at the Met.
It's been the place where I have worked for the past 12 years.. The frienships I have made there are priceless. And I will say that for the most part it's been a good ride.. But it's time to move on.. I made the decision, this summer, to leave the Met and persue a dream.. Hmm somehow I thought that stepping out of my comfrot zone would be easy... NOT! It's quite unnerving!!
Leaving a place that you have become very comfortable with. A place where you always knew you had it there to fall back on.. It was a safety net..
Left it all behind..
I left it behind to... To quote a line from the Paulo Coelho book "The Alchemist" To persue my own personal legend. In other words I am following my heart and persuing my dream. I'm gonna take pictures and write a book..
I leave for France in two weeks....
At this point there seems to be so many what ifs that it's not even funny... Self doubt creeps in and oh la la is that a killer...
But everyone who knows me seems to think I can do it... I wish I were that confident in myself.
Deep down I suppose I know I can do it. And I know I can do very well at it... But as I said that's way deep down right now. Oh well. For now I will sit and contimplate what the hell I am doing. While listening to the endless round of okay music blaring from the car of some guy who was in charge of music from the fiesta across the street...
Ah New York.
One thing it will be nice to just sit and listen to the silence...
~Mel~